She is unhappy right now

My mom and I,
we have no much conversation today,
totally none.

I've been stay in my bedroom for whole day.
I don't know how to face her.
This morning I wanna try to talk with her but she threw things in front of me, and I know that she is still angry of me, so I better get back into bedroom.
I'm very sorry to my mom.
Why my mom will angry?

Now, I felt that this is not Melody anymore.
She's get control by somebody.

This is what I read from Penny's blog,

"Love Life and Life will love you back.

Love People and they'll love you back."

Do you agree with her? Yes I do agree but sometimes I could see that when they love you back, It is not the love that you want or even expected. To me, everyone is so important for me, please do allow me to say the truth, I love my family, my friends, my special one, I can feel their love too. But, once all combined together, It might hurts me and people around me. I'm not Christian, I will not required from Jesus as well. I am a Buddisht, who trust her God so much. I wish that I wanna have a peaceful life, please do lead me how to reach it. Thank you.

I am just a girl, not a super girl, nor intelligent girl. Why give me such difficult life? I'm grateful that I have a very good study life but why I must have unhappy the rest of life? I'm happy actually but just some promised to made me became like this. I did not do any wrong to myself even other people, is that this is one of my life path that I wanted to face?

I am very confused right now,
I felt that I was very happy when I'm in Sem 1.
After I started my Sem 2, everything were changed.
Totally changed.
I enjoyed my class, but during break time, I felt that I have no much time to do discussion with my friends, or even that I have rushing my time to meet him.
This is not me. This is not Melody. This is not Ming Shi.
I asking myself, am I happy to rush like this in my life?

I might feel upset sometimes.
I hate people that who has no patient to wait something.
I'm not purposely to been late also, why everything must kept on blaming me?

I've envy those couple are so sweet and the boyfriend could listen to her and both will respect what they want, why I can't ?

I've changed.
yes, I've changed.
Could someone just please respect me that what I want?
If things could happen again, I could not be in Klang anymore. My decison.
I am not kidding now, I strongly serious what I have told here although this is my blog that what I do during my free time.

I need friends too,
I need time to hang out with friends too.
why he always blame me that I did not accompany him?
He has many friends as well, I didn't complain about why he always been home so late,
why he must get in bed after midnight, why so crazy in badminton and many whysssss.

Honestly, my family quite wonder about him although he mets my family before.
I don't like to get forced to do something that I don't like.

Fast, I wanna get back my kampung to forget about it. But I need to wait until Raya. =__=

I ate my breakfast, mee soup and I didnt eat anything for my lunch. Although my dad ask me for lunch but I couldn't see any food on table. I have no appetite to eat too. Seems sister knew what had happend yesterday so she just chat with me and we watch my drama presentation fairy tale which is Cinderella. I have many of tests next week, all comes together with Maths Quiz, Account Quiz, Econ Quiz and my Role Play presentation. I plan to continue my diploma after I finished my foundation in my college. I am not choosing to accounts anymore bcoz it is tough when you majoring in it. Most of them suggested me to take majoring in Finance.

My mom is so happy when she knows that I going to take major Finance and not Accounts. Thanks to him that who suggest me study in diploma and make my life more colourful. I wish my mom will smile when she see me again. I very sorry that I hurt her so much recently and some misunderstood between us. It started with a punctual-time. next, is my issue, his issue.
She told me that why my boyfren treat me like this and why wants me drive car to find him and why don't he come and meet me up? She doesn't like me to find him but she wish he will automatically to meet me. When I was depressed last week, did he?

I'm a fool, of love.